I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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