sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
