So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
