The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
