i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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