I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
