Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
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