I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
