So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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