Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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