I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
it's great music for shaving your balls
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
