Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
