i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
