I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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