im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Randomize
