I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
