Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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