Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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