id be glad to
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Randomize
