where am i from again
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
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