there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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