He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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