you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize