You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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