Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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