you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
My ass is underappreciated
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize