yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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