Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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