No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
