just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
