sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
