how can u be prego again
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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