Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
