just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
