I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
