the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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