oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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