Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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