Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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