then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
