She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
