Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
