I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
