i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
