Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
only you would photoshop your dick
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
