it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
