we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
