New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
