i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
