oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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